In Which Springheel Tempts Fate (And Receives a Boot up the Arse)

I provided, recently, a summary of the likely reasons for any hiatus in posting. In doing so, I overlooked a possibility. This oversight (in a list purporting to be comprehensive) constituted a gauntlet thrown down to the universal nemesis, the relentless, pitiless and yet sometimes arbitrary governor of our lives. It inadvertently did something I have learned never to do.

It tempted fate.

Now the rules of fate tempting are clear: Don’t do it. I think that’s about it…yes, that’s everything covered. Don’t tempt fate. Never, ever, ever.

So when, in drafting my list, I overlooked the option of being incapacitated by injury or illness…well, I suppose it was inevitable that this is exactly what should befall me. Fate strapped on the Great Big Gnarly Hobnail Boots of Retribution, took a good long run up and booted me viciously in what we English refer to as “the jacksey”.

I speak metaphorically, of course. Suffice to say that my back is immobile and extremely uncomfortable, that as a result I have been a cripple for the last week, that I am currently codeine powered once more, and that, if this post is disappointingly pedestrian in its prose and trivial or dull in content (more than usual, I mean), then I can only say you’re bally well lucky to be getting anything at all.

On the other hand, I suppose I am lucky not to be in a coma or worse.

So, in the interests of self-preservation, may I add two further reasons to my list of why I may not be posting:

I am unwell or injured
I am dead

And hopefully, fate will be appeased…